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Letter to the Editor | Monday, September 28, 2009

For shame Notre Dame, for shame. The viewpoint section has been painfully monotonous this year; it is a disgrace to the reputable name of editorial columns everywhere. Where is the indignation? You didn’t get accepted into this university because you were an apathetic, open-minded urchin. No, you are here because you can banter with the best. I implore you, write into The Observer and express that ire. Is it too much to ask for a little brimstone and fire with my grande french vanilla latte? Release some of that repressed sexual frustration and show me passion, baby!

Topic Suggestions:

1. The Spoon Scandal: “two forks and a knife” barely touched on the possibly apocalyptic implications of this predicament. I’ve had to eat my yogurt with a fork on multiple occasions. Not OK.

2. Lauren Greenfield’s “THIN” exhibit: a truly inspiring piece of work that may even teach some struggling wannarexics how to drop those last few pounds and dive into a debilitating and life-threatening disorder.

3. Swine Flu: Why don’t we just let it run its course? Natural selection, I say. The strongest will survive.

4. Matisyahu: a Hasidic Jewish rapper on a Catholic campus? What if he tried to brainwash us in the same way our President did when he spoke at commencement? Mmm, won’t you pass me a glass of that embryonic Kool-Aid?

5. Sluttle: the clamor of Saint Marys’ girls, lost in the irony of self-efficacy, has demoted the original Urban Dictionary definition. Ugly and fat females of Notre Dame, it’s time to stand up for yourselves!

6. @ndsmcnews: empty promises about unpublished stories? Talk about failure to perform.

7. Pep Rallies: Sorin, your boycotts were a fail.

8. Charlie Weis’ internship: did anyone see him at the career fair?

It’s your turn. Open your laptop and submit something inflammatory! Homogeneity? Not fine by me.

Britt Burgeson


Pasquerilla West

Sept. 28