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Monday, May 13, 2024
The Observer

Spice up Viewpoint

Lately I've been hearing a lot of talk about the lack of effort put forth in the Viewpoint section by the student body. For all the haters out there, allow me to say that you are completely right.

I mean c'mon people, are we really expected to read viewpoints about the same topics week in and week out? As much as I care about hookups and issues of homosexuality and what not, no one's going to get Buddie-status by reinventing the wheel. Actually no one will ever get Buddie status again, but we can at least strive for greatness.

But let's get back to the matter at hand. People submitting views out there need to step their game up. I know you have to let the whole world know that premarital sex is against Catholic teaching, but you're not going to change people's opinions in a paragraph. So do us all a favor and save the theological debates for the classroom.

Second, what's with all the alumni all of a sudden having a Dr. Phil moment? Did you just wake up one morning, eat your breakfast, and suddenly have a desire to get something off your chest. Guess what, you had your shot when you were here, but you missed out, so quit taking up space you old windbags.

Third, enough talk about issues of integrity, or lack thereof. I'm in college, not in grammar school. If I wanted someone to tell me how to live my life, I'd pack my bags and transfer to BYU. The next time someone steals a piece of your pizza at Reckers, do something about. Just don't start crying in our viewpoint.

Finally, the ever-popular hookup topic. Probably the most-talked about issue in our sacred forum, hookups really don't catch my attention like they used to. First of all, it's not a real hookup. Second, people don't really care. Third, we all hate parietals to some extent. Unless of course you are one of those people concerned with shoving integrity down our throats, in which case you should probably be living with the Amish.

So what should be gracing the cover of the only section of the Observer students might read? I can't speak for everybody, but this what I would like to see on a typical Tuesday morning:

1) A solid argument of why Golden Grahams is the most underrated cereal of all time. 2) A complaint regarding the undeniable east coast bias on ESPN. 3) An absolute roast of Chipotle as the most overrated thing of all time (if you've ever been to Mo's, you will understand). 4) The complicated decision process in making a taco in the Dining Hall.

So before you write your next viewpoint about the ethics of one-sided printing, just think about those of us with bigger things on our minds. Because if you don't that's at least five seconds of my life I'm not getting back.