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Ode to Kirby

Christian Myers | Friday, February 25, 2011

Those who are familiar with the popular Nintendo video game “Super Smash Bros” know the character Kirby. For those who are not, Kirby is a pink, round creature from Dream Land who battles the corrupt King DeDeDe and his henchmen.

Kirby has many unique abilities, such as turning himself into a brick and stealing the attributes of his opponents. Kirby is undoubtedly the best character in the Super Smash Bros game.

In the ancient world great warriors and their exploits were remembered with an ode; a lyric poem of praise.

The following is an ode to Kirby, my character of choice in the circus of our modern Rome. It consists of five stanzas of ten lines each; paragraphs correspond to stanzas and lines are separated by a forward slash.

O rosy sprite that doth dance ‘cross the stage! / Your stature and hue belie your great might / Your wide smile hides your warrior’s rage / No opponent can best you in a fight / You float up above the battlefield / Until you strike at the perfect moment / Suddenly, you fall as a heavy brick / You are undaunted should a foe shield / For fighting fury it serves to foment / You counter with a well-placed punch or kick

You fly up high with glowing scimitar / And come back down with a blue cutter wave / To escape an enemy must run far / Or with shield the cutter attack brave / In the end it matters not; victory / Shall come to the small, stubby-limbed ball / You guard the edge with well-timed attacks / Down and A putting enemies away / You wave and say “Hiiii” as opponents fall / You resume fighting with more foes to slay

Should your stratagems fail or moves fall short / You adopt the power of another / You inhale a foe like a tasty torte / Then don a cap to look like each other / Now you expertly wield this power / Assaulting your foes with their own techniques / Leaving wanton destruction in your wake / Perhaps you snatch up a fire flower / And burn each enemy, those foolish freaks / Counter attacks come but you never break

Fight on, oh pink orb, smash all your foes / Transform yourself into a brick and fall / In this dense form you deal quite heavy blows / Those below flee in fear, but you crush all / For you anticipated their escape / you fell where they would be, not where they were / Having outsmarted all your enemies / You regain your belov’d spherical shape / You punch and punch and your arms are a blur / Challengers you kick and triumph you seize

You know well the tactics of Master Hand / When you face him you dodge and strike and dodge / You control the fight; Kirby in command / Between you and the floor that hand will lodge / Unable to escape your bold assault / Now all that’s left are his final death throes / A quite familiar situation / In ultimate triumph you thus exalt / You emerge the greatest of all heroes / Yet the next day you must fight once again

The views expressed in the Inside Column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.

Contact Christian Myers at cmyers8@nd.edu