Style With Sean
Sean Fitzgerald | Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Last week I donated my hair to Pantene’s Beautiful Lengths so tone lucky cancer patient will someday be able to have a full head of red hair. Going from 8.5 inches to basically 0 is not only scary, but hard to get used to. However, I can already tell the difference. Based on my experience, here are the pros and cons of long hair vs. a shaved head.
Pros of Long Hair
You Can Head Bang like a Pro: Have you ever gone to a concert and just felt like headbanging, but it just didn’t feel quite right? It’s because you don’t have hair smacking you in the face on the downbang and then hair flying up on the upbang. Proper headbanging technique requires long hair. It was also a requirement to be a rock god in the ’80s. The ’80s really wouldn’t have been the same without all that hair flying around.
Girls Wanting to Play With It: Yes, this truly does happen. The sheer number of times girls asked to French braid my hair was a little scary. It’s like they think it’s their own little play toy that they mix and match into pretty shapes and colors. Warning: Do not take up anyone’s offer to put your hair into cornrows.
You Might Look Better: You’re an average Joe. Your hair has been short forever. You will never know if long hair might actually make you look better. It has something to do with your face shape (round, diamond, square, cylindrical, Magnum, dreamy, etc.), but that’s not my area of expertise. All I know is that you might actually like it. If you don’t, you can always go back.
Cons of Long Hair
High Maintenance: Remember when your parents said you could get a dog, but you had to take care of it? Well this is the exact same thing. If you can put up with it, you might reap the rewards. If not, you might look like a bum.
The Your-Mom-is-Going-to-Try-to-Cut-it-Off-Herself Dilemma: All Moms are programmed to make sure that their child does not do anything crazy. She also wants you to look like a “good boy.” She doesn’t want her son to turn into a “rebel.” If you grow out your hair, she will try to cut it off. It’s in her nature.
Pros of a Shaved Head
Manly: Almost the universal sign of a man is a man with short hair. Soldiers have shaved heads, Bruce Willis is bald or maybe you just want to look like Mr. Clean. Either way, short hair exhibits manliness.
Easy and Simple: If you have short hair all you have to do is jump in the shower, put in some shampoo and rinse. After 3 to 4 weeks, you just shave it again. The sheer amount of money saved on haircuts might be worth it.
Cons of a Shaved Head
Same Old Same Old: It’s kind of boring. If you have had it short forever, isn’t it time to branch out a bit?
Shapely Noggin: In order to pull off the true shaved head look without looking like a deformed alien, you need a nice shapely head. You can’t afford to have any bumps or asymmetrical features. However, if you’ve got any crazy scars (like myself), you can show them off.
Contact Sean Fitzgerald at firstname.lastname@example.org
The views in this column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.