Last week I accepted a dare that I was actually very excited to undertake.
No, the dare was not eating pasta and cheese every day. I do that already.
The dare was to apply and audition for the Irish Bachelorette.
Some of you who are not up to date with the latest Notre Dame gossip may be asking, "What is the Irish Bachelorette?"
The Irish Bachelorette is an upcoming NDtv show that will bring the format of the nationally televised ABC series "The Bachelorette" to our lovely campus. With the backdrop of Golden Dome (and hopefully LaFun at 2 a.m. on a Saturday), 10 Fighting Irish men will be vying for one lovely woman.
Hoping to get lucky, the men will be in pursuit of a special clover. The men will be receiving shamrocks as they are chosen to continue in each round, in place of the usual rose used on the national television show.
With full knowledge of what I was getting myself into, I applied to the program online with this little blurb:
"Gender relations at Notre Dame can at times be difficult. At other times, impossible.
While spending all of my free time chasing boys has been rewarding, I feel as if it's about time they chase me. All sarcasm aside, I think that this show is an interesting way to both laugh at the ND dating scene and learn from it. There are a lot of issues within the romantic conventions at Notre Dame that can be effectively addressed through the awkward, intriguing nature of such a show."
Then in the application I went on to describe my quest for Domer love:
"I'm really just a nice human being, who enjoys reading Plato and discussing philosophy on a Friday night while partaking on a long walk around St. Joseph's beach, looking for friendship and something more substantive than a sweaty dorm-party hook-up."
Isn't that what we're all hoping for?
My persuasive rhetoric must have caught their attention since I was soon notified that I would be called for an audition-an audition that would only take five to 10 minutes in room in Alumni. Cue eerie scary movie music and an audience screaming, "Don't go in there!"
I was a little skeptical as I walked in on a Thursday afternoon to sit down with a group of complete strangers. I went in having no idea how I would respond to any of their questions, so my answers were genuine and surprising, even to me.
I realized my answers to what I want in a relationship, what I look for in a friend, what I find necessary for a healthy relationship, what my ideal date is, only just as they asked the questions.
I was honestly just as intrigued by the answers coming out of my mouth as they pretended to be.
That's one thing I enjoyed about the experience: answering questions I usually forget to ask myself.
So often, we go through our lives without taking a moment to think what it is we want, what our intentions are. But when you are sitting in a room with five people and one camera staring right at you, asking you to hold yourself accountable to your answers, you really have no choice but to figure yourself out.
The experience served for me as reminder as to what I'm actually hoping for in another who could be one day significant. And it made it significantly obvious that I don't know if I've found that person yet or that, if I have, I'm not in the place to realize it. I can barely handle hanging out with myself all the time, let alone someone else.
And that leads into the other thing I really enjoyed about this dare: experiencing myself as if I were a stranger. This may sound weird, but let me explain.
We spend a lot of time in with ourselves. I don't know about you, but I'm with myself for about 24 hours of the day, every day. Obviously, with this extreme amount of one on one time, myself and I can get pretty sick of each other.
As I sat talking with some wonderful strangers and saw their reactions to me and my answers, it was akin to when you catch a glimpse of someone in a mirror and don't realize for a second that the person in the mirror is you.
It can be a very humbling and encouraging experience, to explain who you are to people who have no preconceived notions of you.
To them, I am merely a sophomore in Farley, majoring in the Program of Liberal Studies. I am simply a writer for The Observer and a singer in the Folk Choir. I am a girl who enjoys a meaningful and enriching conversation, with a good dose of laughter mixed in. I am a weirdo whose ideal date is driving out into the country, hiking up a mountain and then camping under the stars, watching the sun set and rise while discussing philosophy. I am a Catholic who wants Socrates' Second Speech in "Phaedrus" to be read at my wedding. This is the person they got to know in those ten minutes.
The exciting part about being merely "this" in their eyes is in realizing if this and only this is who I am to someone, I am pretty okay with that.
Disclaimer: While we regret to inform you, readers of The Observer, that Gabriela Leskur was not chosen to represent the Notre Dame female student body on the Irish Bachelorette, if any bachelors are so compelled, Ms. Leskur is still accepting applications.
Contact Gabriela Leskur at
gleskur@nd.edu
The views expressed in this column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.
