The Good, The Bad, The Green
Erin McAuliffe | Monday, March 17, 2014
Abnormally green colored food is generally a sign that it must be spoiled and inedible. However, there is one day a year when green food is intentionally served and celebrated: St. Patrick’s Day.
Once, my mom decided to get in the St. Patrick’s Day spirit and make us an entirely green breakfast. She added green food dye to our milk and served green eggs with green pancakes. Although it tasted the same, there is something about green food, especially in the morning, that left me unsure of how to feel about what I had just ingested.
I may be irresolute in my feelings toward dyed green foods – part of me wants to be spirited but the other part is saying, “I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them, Sam-I-Am” – however, there are a few green things in this world that I am completely sure of my stance on.
Elphaba: Perhaps the most misunderstood, cruelly represented character in modern times, Elphaba, the young version of the green Wicked Witch of the West in the “Wizard of Oz,” had me shedding tears during “Wicked.” She was a free spirit who dealt with glittery narcissistic Glinda even though she had no interest in being “pop-uuu-lar.” She is later framed and made to look evil in the musical, so she defies gravity on her broom and leaves Oz. She is such a strong female lead who doesn’t let the haters get her down.
Edamame: This wonder-bean provides me with the protein I need when the grilled chicken in the dining hall is inedible. It tastes great salted and it is so fun to pop the beans straight out of the pod.
Money: “Cash Rules Everything Around Me” – Wu Tang Clan
The Green Light: One of the first times I saw a deeper meaning in a literary work, the green light in “The Great Gatsby” comes to represent hope, specifically Gatsby’s hope to carry out his dream of reliving his past with Daisy. (Not to mention, green lights on the road are rather great.) I also just loved this book and have since tried to emulate Daisy whenever applicable. For example, I cut my hair into a pixie and own too many embellished, flapper-inspired dresses.
Kermit: Okay, I know Kermit thinks, “It’s not easy being green;” however, he ultimately accepts and enjoys it. He comes to realize, “I am green, and it’ll do fine. It’s beautiful, and I think it’s what I want to be.” Kermit is adorable and manages to put up with Miss Piggy’s pursuit of him.
The Wicked Witch of The West: She filled my childhood with green nightmares. Her cackle and herd of flying monkeys succeeded in terrifying me. When she set the scarecrow on fire, it was the last straw.
Peas: Ew. They’re mushy and hard to eat. They are too small to pierce but also roll off forks. I can’t eat them without spilling half on the floor.
Money: “It’s like the more money we come across the more problems we see” – The Notorious B.I.G.
Algae: I avoid this stuff when swimming in the lake and yet it manages to get stuck under my swim cap. Also, they sometimes sneak it into smoothies and juices, which is questionable. Algae overall is pretty putrid.
Unripe Bananas: Also, ripe bananas. I hate bananas. They are the grossest texture and they stink, literally. The smell infiltrates any food around them. In grade school, my friends and I would trade lunch food. Grace sometimes had bananas in her lunch, and one time I traded her my chips for her Goldfish and all the Goldfish tasted like bananas. The incident was a tragedy and I never traded with Grace again.
I hope your St. Patrick’s Day was filled with the former green things and devoid of the latter. Especially unripe bananas.