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Just don’t say …

Nicole Zook | Thursday, January 27, 2005

Students in South Bend often complain about the virtually nonexistent dating scene. As a long-time people-watcher who has seen it all, I feel I might be able to shed some light on the situation and offer up some advice to those of you who just can’t seem to meet new people. There is an old universal standby that just does not seem to work in this little corner of the world, and avoiding it might just save your social life.The pick-up line. Often used, often laughed at, it seems to be a staple of today’s social scene. Personally, I think they’re hilarious – ladies and gentlemen, do you seriously think a line like “I’m writing a telephone book; can I have your number?” will work on that gorgeous member of the opposite sex you noticed at the bar?Let me tell you now, if you don’t already know.It won’t.Sure, they’re fun, they’re cheesy, but pick-up lines are very rarely useful in reality. In a real-life situation, this is how the pick-up line is received:Guy:  I couldn’t help but notice I was staring at you.Girl:  Get away from me, freak.Well, to be fair, a polite girl might just give a dirty look and walk away. But that’s what she is thinking. Trust me. That girl will go home with her friends and laugh at you for using such a stupid line. Save yourself the trouble, and don’t do it.I think the problem is people see a pick-up line as an entity all its own. Too much certainty and nervous energy is placed in that one line – people think if the first line bombs, you are a failure, and if it is great you have it made. This is simply bad logic.The initial introduction between two people should be nothing more than a good start to an interesting conversation. The pick-up line should not stand alone. If you bank all your hopes on one line and do not have anything to follow it up with, you may as well not have even attempted the approach. The initial line is the means to an end, and the desired end should be a good conversation both of you will remember the next day.Keeping this purpose in mind, when you first walk up to that hottie this weekend, try injecting your introduction with some of your stunning personality instead of a force-fed line that he or she has already heard from ten other people. You have at least one great quality you can use to your advantage – be it your intelligence, sense of comic timing – or simply the fact that you are really ridiculously good looking. Remember that about yourself and approach your object of desire with confidence in yourself.Just don’t start with “I’m not drunk, I’m just intoxicated by you.”