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Friday, April 19, 2024
The Observer

I'm a maniac, that's all!

Dearest Domers,

I'm feeling unusually energetic today, and not just because of my brisk swim through St. Joseph's Lake this morning.

No, I'm feeling energetic for a different reason, a special reason. But what is it? Hmm . . . special . . . Special K . . . cereal . . . milk . . . cow . . . mad cow disease . . . disease . . . mania . . . mania? Mania! That's it! RecycleMania!

That's right, ladies and gentlemen! RecycleMania is here! I can't believe it's been a year already, but you know what they say: Time flies when you're a mute, green-skinned humanoid.

What is RecycleMania, you ask? It's an eight-week competition among 522 universities in the U.S. and Canada to reduce waste and increase recycling efforts. There is an array of categories to compete in, including Grand Champ (just as the Grand Canyon's formation was heavily based on the rate of water flowing through the Colorado River, this category is based on overall campus recycling rate), Per Capita Classic (more classic than Shakespeare, this category is based on the total recycling per person), Gorilla (based on the total weight recycled. If a team of gorillas can't lift your school's weekly recyclingyou're in pretty good shape) as well as several other categories.

Last year we finished 108th out of 266 in the Grand Champ category and 63 out of 296 in the Gorilla category. While these results aren't terrible, they do leave a bad taste in my mouth. Almost as bad as Selena Gomez's taste in men!

Similar to DJ Khaled, all I want to do is win, win, win. However, Khaled and I differ in that we have different things on our minds. While he has money on his, I have a different kind of green on mine (both literally and figuratively): Sustainability. You can help Notre Dame win and be more sustainable by ramping up your own efforts to recycle.

Those dead batteries from your calculator? They're recyclable. That plastic bag your Cheesy Gordita Crunch came in? That's recyclable. That paper you just got back? That's recyclable. This copy of The Observer telling you to recycle? Ooh you better believe that's recyclable! Cardboard, plastic, aluminum, styrofoam, glass, you name it! If it isn't a food or liquid, chances are it's recyclable.

No matter where you go and what you're doing, try and remember to recycle. With each empty Starbucks cup in the recycling bin we help our planet and step closer to a Notre Dame victory.

With so many other universities competing, the task at hand may seem daunting, but as Bon Jovi always tells us: Don't Stop Believing.

Until next time,

GreenMan

P.S. Or was that Journey?


Email your predicaments to The GreenMan at askthegreenman@gmail.com and let him answer you with a sustainable twist. The GreenMan will be here every other week to provide you with insights you never knew you were missing out on until now.

The views expressed in this column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.


The views expressed in this column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.