The finest of formals
Letter to the Editor | Thursday, April 21, 2016
As the voice of our generation, T-Pain famously said: “spring is sprung.” That may be a misquote, but I’m pretty sure Will Ferrell did say, “gotta have me more boats and bros,” and that’s even more relevant. Because this coming Wednesday, April 27, the men of St. Edward’s Hall are traveling to Chicago to enjoy yet another night aboard the Mystic Blue. The night is sure to be replete with merriment and laughter, but there’s still one minor issue. As yet, many of the Steds gentlemen do not have dates to join us. What’s the point of having the best dorm formal if you have no one to enjoy it with?
Steds is steeped in tradition, and so I come to you now, as my predecessors have before me, to humbly ask you to ask me to ask you to Yacht Dance. If you got lost in the “asks” there, I can clarify. Check out the URL below, which links to this year’s “Steds’ President (and friends) Yacht Dance Application presented by Google Forms.” The application is filled with tough questions like “What is your favorite speech, real or fictional?” and “On a 1-5 scale, how much do you like to dance?” If it seems too daunting, be at ease knowing there are no required questions. Feel free to answer all the questions — or none of them. I like a girl who’s mysterious.
Anyway, I’d love to get to know you, and hopefully take you on a night out that would make the Notre Dame Gender Relations Center say, “that’s what we’re talking about!” Plus, I’ve got a really big team, and they really need dates too. Maybe you’d rather go with them. For the first time ever, the Steds President’s application includes that option as well. Apply any time up to one hour before Yacht Dance, but I’m probably going to make a decision on Saturday so maybe apply before then. Better yet, apply today and prepare to set sail!
I’m out for Steds Presidents to represent me,
St. Edward’s Hall class of 2017
The views expressed in this Letter to the Editor are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.