Where do senior friendships go?
Gabrielle Jansen | Monday, April 24, 2017
Hey seniors, I know you are wigging out about the future, but here’s some advice: go easy on your friends. Yes, your friends. They’re just as stressed as you too. I know it is scary not having solid plans, and it seems like they have their futures figured out, but they honestly don’t. We’re all in the same boat, stop imagining that you’re the only one in a boat full of holes out at sea (or the Fisher Regatta, if that seems more personal). Stop holding things against them that are out of both of your control.
On that note, we need to stop dumping our problems to our friends without thinking about them. As much as I wish I am Wonder Woman, I can only bear so much. I can only love so much before the weight of the world starts to crack my shoulders. Friends are great, we’re there for each other, but when it becomes one sided complaining and angst, it gets unhealthy for both. Those that are always venting to the one friend needs to realize that, while they have good reasons for their feelings, should know they’re friend is one person who can’t change anything and is probably tired of the ranting. For the friend on the receiving end, if they’re the cheerleader of the relationship, it gets disheartening and another stresser when finishing the year. But you can’t say no to that person because you want to be supportive. When the world is turning on all of us as seniors, it’s hard to support others when you can’t find any support for yourself.
As often discussed around the tri-campuses, we all like to brag about how busy we are, and seem to almost put down those who are on top of their schedule. Well, no one is on top of it as seniors, we’re all trying to get through this struggle of graduation and plans afterwards. Stop pitying yourself by comparing yourself to others. Again with the boat analogy, we might be on the same sinking ship, but everyone’s destination is different. Stop holding these standards that your friends and acquaintances should be doing what you’re doing.
It’s hard seeing our friends change in the last few months. Some have immediate plans for jobs or graduate school. Some have done the ring by spring. And others just haven’t. Instead of being mad at seeing how your friends have changed, realize how much you have changed. Enjoy it before you both go off and not see each other for a while. Just be patient.
I know I’m scared of the future. I have yet to hear back from places I’ve applied to, while some of friends already know when they start at their jobs. We’re all stressed, it’s normal, just remember that you love these people and that they’re only human too.
The views expressed in this column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.