Letter to the Editor | Wednesday, April 5, 2017
Has Zahm done something to annoy you? Ever wanted to take out years of built-up frustration caused by Notre Dame’s favorite scapegoat through some harmless means that won’t get you into trouble?
If so, come throw pies at my face. If not, come throw pies at my face anyway. My name is Alex Bonino and I am the president of Zahm House, and I am extending a cordial invitation to all of campus to try their best to decorate my face in the name of charity. Friday will be the first ever Zahmapalooza on North Quad. Zahm will be hosting a variety of carnival games after classes are over for the first week of April, so come out and see how hard you can splatter whipped cream all over my ugly mug. Every pie you throw will cost $1 and all proceeds go toward the the Children’s Dispensary and Hospital of South Bend. So if you love helping people, come blow off some steam by plastering the president of Notre Dame’s most prestigious residence house with Reddi-wip. Hit the weight room and perfect that throwing motion, and perhaps you can be the first person to knock the contacts out of my eyes.
Other than emotionally scarring me, you can also participate in a multitude of carefree events at Zahmapalooza. Try on one of our Sumo suits and challenge your friends to a battle of strength, participate in the Bun Run (it’s just a hot dog eating relay race), or just come hangout in the sun and eat some good food. There will be plenty more activities, but we shan’t spoil them; come find out for yourself what else is in store. All that matters is that we will be having ourselves a splendid afternoon on Zahm Quad, so be sure to stop by and have fun with us.
Additionally, I tend to get bloody noses pretty easily so you might get the added bonus of plowing pie so far up my nose that I have to take a break to mop up my face.
Out like my dignity,
class of 2019
The views expressed in this Letter to the Editor are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.