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viewpoint

Right now: exploring the realities of race in a ‘post-racial’ society

| Wednesday, March 20, 2019

How does it feel?

Right now?

I’m pissed.

I’m mad.

I feel sick.

As much as I try not to,

Right now?

I really hate you.

I hate it when you walk.

I hate it how you talk.

I hate you like you hated me,

Even when I was so small.

The hate you gave?

It’s boiling in my veins.

A searing flame.

It runs through my heart,

Tearing it apart.

Right now?

Holl’up.

Let’s take it back to the start.

Let’s go back

to when I was free.

Free from the chains.

Free from you.

Free from the pain.

When I was free.

Right now?

A distant memory.

My home.

My family.

All alone.

You lay yourself down to sleep

Somehow,

At peace.

You prayed to your Lord

Your soul to keep

As you sailed away

Ignoring my weep.

Everything, you had to take.

The only thing you gave?

Everlasting hate.

You pushed me down

So you could rise.

Right now?

It’s still a fight.

You try to ignore it.

Try to be blind.

“I don’t see color,

I live in the light.”

But don’t you see

My color?

It’s a part of me.

It sits on my face,

It kinks up my hair,

And that’s just a taste.

It weighs me down

Every single day.

But right now?

Now I see,

Despite everything,

I see me,

I see my strength,

Finally.

But it’s hard, you see.

And that’s what I hate.

You get it all so easily.

You don’t have to fight.

You don’t have to think.

About any of these things.

What’s it like?

Being white.

Just getting to live.

What a life.

Right now?

Although I try,

I’m still angry.

After all this time,

Barely even an apology.

Right now?

You expect me to heal,

Like it’s all long and gone,

Like there’s nothing left to feel.

You’re ready to move on.

Tired of the past,

Tired of the pain,

From all the hate you gave.

You

Want to be great again.

Right now?

I

Want to be free.

Again.

Miranda Cuozzo

freshman

March 18

The views expressed in this Letter to the Editor are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.

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