One of the most remarkable achievements of the 20th and 21st centuries has been the swift and transformative rise of women in political, economic and social spheres. While women’s progress is rightly celebrated — and can be furthered — data shows that many boys and men are falling behind. The issue falls under growing scrutiny, with proposed solutions ranging from raising teacher salaries and recruiting more male educators to expanding trade schools and delaying kindergarten entry for boys to account for their slower brain development.
Importantly, advocating for greater support and attention for our nation’s young men doesn’t equate to blaming their struggles on the progress of women. Such thinking is not only inaccurate but also counterproductive, as it fuels political extremism and deepens polarization.
Alternatively, men can — and should — learn from women’s success. We’ve long emphasized to young women that opportunities are within reach, and we’ve understood the importance of strong female role models. Yet we've fallen short of applying the same focus to young men.
Nationally, boys and men face numerous challenges. Boys are more than twice as likely as girls to be diagnosed with ADHD and less likely to finish high school. At first glance, this might seem like a problem that doesn’t affect us directly, especially at a place like Notre Dame, where male and female students are nearly equal in number. While campuses like ours appear balanced, the broader picture is stark: nationwide, men now comprise only 40.5% of college students, and male enrollment in community colleges plummeted by 14.8% in 2020 alone.
It’s tempting to attribute these struggles to laziness or to suggest they stem from resentment over women’s advancement in the workplace, but such oversimplifications ignore the deeper, more systemic challenges men face. Boys are often raised in fractured families, with 40% now growing up without their fathers — double the rate in 1980. As a result, many boys miss out on key male role models, making it harder for them to envision success, both academically and personally. The struggles faced by many men can create a self-perpetuating cycle, and the impact is felt far beyond the classroom in the form of declining workforce participation, rising suicide rates and “deaths of despair” caused by suicide, overdose and alcoholism.
Beyond family structure, men also face cultural and social barriers. The ingrained perception of masculine stoicism makes it harder for men to seek help — many are reluctant to share personal struggles with friends or view therapy as a viable option. Conversely, it’s implicitly understood that female RAs at Notre Dame assume greater responsibility for maintaining culture and bonds between residents.
However, this challenge doesn’t have to be met with pessimism. Gender equality isn’t a zero-sum game — helping young men doesn’t take away from the progress women have made. Research encouragingly shows that male teachers and role models can significantly improve boys' outcomes. And you don’t necessarily need to change your career path to make a difference — we can start making that difference right now.
As leader of Big Brothers Big Sisters at Notre Dame, where I am also a mentor myself, I see firsthand how boys can thrive when given the right support. These boys — many from single-parent homes — are eager for guidance, connection and mentorship. In South Bend alone, over 100 children are waiting to be matched with mentors and the number of unmatched young boys is over double the number of unmatched young girls.
While I of course welcome all Notre Dame students to serve as Bigs, Notre Dame men in particular can contribute to lessening the disparate access to mentorship that young boys face. Spending just a couple of hours every week or two is a small commitment at first, but it is one that has blossomed into one of my most rewarding — and memorable — experiences in college.
A commitment to mentorship also aligns with the broader values of the Notre Dame community. As members of a campus with a strong “pro-life” ethos, we should extend that commitment beyond birth. Being pro-life encompasses improving the lives of young boys and men, many of whom are struggling in ways society has overlooked. Whether it’s mentoring, advocating for better education access or simply offering support to the young men around us, we can each contribute by demonstrating through our actions — not just our words — that every life holds inherent value.
Lastly, my call to action ties directly into Fr. Dowd’s vision for Notre Dame. In his inaugural address, Fr. Dowd emphasized “building bridges” between communities and expanding the University's engagement with the world. I applaud the many who are already involved in local organizations, but there is room for many more to contribute. For anyone seeking to build a bridge to the local community, I extend to you an opportunity to help realize Fr. Dowd’s vision by becoming a Big.
The disproportionately high number of boys on the waiting list at Big Brothers Big Sisters doesn't have to be a story of unmet needs. In fact, it gives me hope — boys are taking the initiative to seek guidance. Now it's our turn to step up and be there for them.
