Small but definite

Things can get overwhelming here. Most mornings during the school year, the moment my alarm goes off, my brain immediately jumps into a rapid-fire assessment of my to-do list for that day, reviewing the detailed timetable I had assigned myself the night prior. I am not quite a Type A person, and strict schedules and airtight plans are not my preference, but a maxed out agenda gives me little choice. 

Every week is different, though. Asides from the theory (read: indisputable fact) that professors most definitely work in cahoots to condense a dozen tests and assignments into a span of four days, there are fluctuations in the academic workload, extracurricular functions and of course the rarely in-sync availabilities of friends to coordinate plans. 

It’s nice to have a constant. A constant relief to look forward to, a constant solace for when RStudio decides to wipe out your entire assignment when an hour ago it was perfectly ready for submission. 

One of the several words in my mother tongue that I consistently wish I could express in English is so-hwak-haeng. This one is not my grandmother’s proper Korean. It’s one of the myriad of modern-day, abbreviated expressions that derive from my dear country. Slang, colloquial, call it what you want. I won’t dive into the linguistic technicalities of it. 

The phrase essentially means “a small but definite happiness”. It’s a singular thing, a singular happiness, that is uncomplicated but certain. A small treat you can rely on that will sprinkle joy into even one of the professors-in-cahoots weeks. 

I have the privilege of living with The Observer’s distinguished social media editor Emma Duffy – while this is her tagline of choice, sometimes I’ll refer to her as my beloved friend and roommate. 

We’ve settled into something of a set of traditions. Our weekly movie nights, watching our favorite classics like “Sabrina” and “Pretty Woman,” have been an allocated time for us to decompress on a Sunday evening and take a break from everything else. Since we are in agreement that none of the best movies are free, we budget the few dollars’ expense of renting these movies as a vital expense. Our second small treat, complementary to these movie nights, is a refreshed box of Insomnia cookies for each week, also solidified into the household budget. And every week, we opt for a disproportionately large amount of chocolate chip cookies and very few of any other flavor. And that’s just the way we like it, the way we look forward to it. 

It may all sound a little self-indulgent. To that, I say I write a viewpoint column for a college newspaper, so you already knew I was self-indulgent. These “small but definite happinesses” motivate me, uplift my mood and help me cope with the schedules of it all. 

There are countless things that you’ve probably fixed upon as your own so-hwak-haeng perhaps without even realizing it. I like to spontaneously curl or blow out my hair for no particular reason other than because I swear I feel more productive when my hair is done. I like to pace myself when the book I’m reading is getting to its good parts because I like to savor it one chapter at a time, to-do list complete and cozied up in bed. These should always be a bit odd. 

I also find it endlessly interesting to hear what everyone else’s small treats are. I’ve asked a few of my friends to share theirs, and received an assorted set of responses. 

For Kate, it’s a Trader Joe’s sheet cake. “Coming home each day and being able to cut myself a sliver of the TJ’s vanilla bean sheet cake — though the seasonal pumpkin one is off the charts too — is the best feeling in the world. What a treat. What a time to be alive.” 

For Sarah, it’s taking walks. “Taking a walk always helps me think, and I like taking the time to reflect and clear my head, even if I don’t have a specific destination.” 

For Cleveland, it’s trying new places for dinner. “I’m always running around but a nice dinner on a free evening gives me a chance to just sit down and unwind.”

For Corinne, it’s working on puzzles with her roommates. “Sitting around our puzzle table gives us a nice, mental break from our day-to-day, and it’s nice to do creative activity since we don’t get to do too much of that at school. I love the gratification and satisfaction of creating something.” 

For John, it’s a Culver’s Reese’s Concrete, as a “go-to pick me up”, while he will “never reveal how often he goes to Culver’s”. 

For Claire, it’s buying herself some boba, because “a fun drink can always give some fun to my day, even if it’s been very mundane.”

Gathering these responses has swelled my appreciation for the way everyone seems to have their clear and fond answers. It’s an attestation of our nature, the small treat. It’s our daily, subconscious commitment to dedicate some effort to refresh and rejuvenate. The investment of these small but definite luxuries nourishes our peace of mind, and gives us a sense of balance. The return on this investment, of your so-hwak-haeng, is priceless.