Recently, I read “Everything I Know About Love” by Dolly Alderton, which I highly recommend reading before entering your twenties. I can’t say I have many experiences dabbling with love; however, I’ve always had this idea that I’ll meet this boy who would fix everything. It felt like finding this love would make life brighter. Romantic love seemed like the most exciting and worthwhile thing on this earth. However, the reality of dating in college is that you are on a completely different page than boys, and let me tell you that it is heartbreaking when you become aware of this.
Some of us are born with the idea that true love exists. It’s a belief system that keeps us locked up in a fantasy, turning real life into a disappointment over and over again. The reality is that love isn’t meant to be this fantasy of pure happiness, and looking for this fantasy is exhausting. At the end of the day all this deters you from noticing the real love you found at college. Those late nights running back from Main Circle to the dorm with your best friends. Those Olivia Rodrigo concerts in your room after a breakup, singing until your throats feel dry. The Huddle Mart runs after every place closed at 9 and your stomachs are grumbling. The nights where they hold onto you until you can finally breathe again from all the crying.
The thing is you have found true love (hopefully). You’ve known each other for many months and in all that time, you’ve never gotten bored of them. You fall more and more in love with them the older you get and the more experiences you share. You have an abundance of love already in your life. Sure, it’s not the love that kisses you by the Dome or proposes marriage at the Grotto. But, I know it will listen when you cry, it will celebrate your highs, promise to beat him up when he’s being mean, be first row at your wedding and grow along with you. And, honestly, there’s an eternal peace knowing you will always have someone in your corner who accepts you for all flaws. This type of love is forever. So, keep it as close to you as you can.
And like Dolly said, “Anyone can be […] fancied. It is a far greater thing to be truly loved.”
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The views expressed in this Inside Column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.